Monday, July 14, 2008

You Know You're A Great Dane Owner When....

You can tell when I don't have anything to blog about these days when I force feed Dane stuff down your blogger throats....sorry! :D



# the sound of running water makes you jump up and yell, "OUTSIDE!" (thankfully I don't have this problem...mine are very much potty trained!)

# you tell your dog to sit, and he backs up until he finds a chair (or couch in my house!)

# it takes 3 people to get your dog on the scale at the vets

# you walk your dog and everyone knows him by name, but you have no idea who these people are

# you can carry on a conversation with a dog's muzzle firmly in your crotch

# your dog can hide an entire tennis ball (among other things) fully inside his lips and give you that innocent look that says, "What? I'm not eating anything!"

# you carry a tape measure with you when shopping for a new vehicle (done this!)

# you keep at least one color-coded "drool towel" in every room of your house

# after banishing your husband, the snoring in your bedroom still keeps you awake (LOL...every nite it seems!)

# you are hiking with a friend who later suggests that you ought to have an environmental impact statement done on your dog

# visitors enter the house holding their privates protectively

# you toss your dog a ball and cringe when he almost hits his head on the top of the doorway

# you take your dog for a ride and he rests his head on your arm, causing you to make random right turns

# you have given up on water dishes and you just use the bathtub (or sink in our case)

# your two dogs decide to play in the house, and they end up pulling the ceiling fan down -- for the second time

# you have to move over when brushing your teeth because your dog wants a drink

# you show a picture of your dogs and kids together, and the first person you point out is your dog (I might have done this once or twice)

# while stopped at a stop light, everyone stares as your car rocks back and forth because the dog is panting out the window

# you go to vacuum your car and most of the fur is up there on the ceiling

# you avoid the dogs on your way out the door, so they won't smear your makeup

# you've learned to force a smile when asked "do you have a saddle for that thing?"

# the monthly dog budget exceeds your home mortgage payment

# Your veterinarian has been able to put in a swimming pool, build a large home, buy jet skis and a personal plane

# you have had to train your dog not to lick dishes, and the dishes are in the sink

# the donuts you put on top of the refrigerator are gone when you get home and your dog has powdered sugar on his nose (nothing is safe on the fridge at our house!)

# your dog can see what you're cooking, and he tries to assist you in the preparation

# you're holding him straddled between your legs when the doorbell rings, you take a short (but fast!) ride straight to the door

# the pizza delivery people tell you to meet them at the end of the sidewalk (hehe...they do!)

# your dog stands in your lap and reaches over you to stick his head in the drive-through window at MacDonald's and nearly gives the cashier a heart attack when she turns around to give you your change

# you purchase a large screen TV and you still can't see the program when he stands in front of the television

# after surgery, your bored pup decides to get up and cruise around the vet's office-- pulling the rolling IV stand behind him

9 comments:

Greg (Accessible Hunter) said...

I really had a good laugh reading this post, Thanks. My service dog is a lab I feel very lucky right now, lol

Bar L. said...

Oh my gosh, these are hysterical! I especially like the one about the drive-thru window. You Dane people really are crazy!!! :)

crazy4danes said...

Greg- I'm glad you got a kick out of it...I even sometimes wonder..."what am I doing?!" LOL I love labs by the way!

Layla- Yes we are a little bit crazy! :P Glad you liked them!

Anonymous said...

I think Brooke has a great Dane, she does a blog called "Neocon Headquarters" I think it is. People who have those dogs sure do love them.

crazy4danes said...

Hermit- I will have to check out her blog for sure then! Thanks! :)

Rita Loca said...

I still miss our Great Dane. We had here for 14 years in Venezuela.

crazy4danes said...

14 years is AWESOME for a Great Dane! And I still miss the ones I've lost too!

Rio Arriba said...

Love it! I laughed and laughed and recognized just about every one. I had Danes once, many years ago. You haven't LIVED 'til you've driven to CA from GA and back with two Danes in a VW beetle.

The big one (they were both full grown) disliked seeing other dogs while we drove and would bark and carry on, turning around to glare at them out of the back window and beating the driver half to death with that blackjack of a tail.

Wouldn't swap the memories for anything. Thanks for the reminder.

mmiller said...

My daughter& I laughed while reading this.Our Dane is 8& we have same problems at McDonalds,at the vet,& with his water,etc. I put fresh water out daily,he refuses to drink it.He will only drink from the bathroom sink.he will bother someone in the house until they get up to turn on water & he won't stop until you do it.He makes certin facial expressions &noises for water,to go out,a treat,food,or his ear rubbed.He also took over one of our couches. If someone pulls back the blanket to sit while he's away,he will stand there staring sadly at you & he'll keep giving you his paw,he won't leave. The person always moves to a new spot for him. Were always laughing at his quirks. If I'm watching tv and he wants attention,he will walk in front of tv to block the screen. Definitely the most human like dog I have ever had.I always say it's like we have our own language with him. He's so spoiled & loved,but he deserves it. In return he gives us love,laughter, & loyalty.